Obedience
by Halcyon Dementia
Summary: Jessica learns obedience during the beginning of her time with Kilgrave.


I had no control. I wanted to. False desires seeped like disease into my bloodstream while I remained a prisoner at the core of my mind. He was changing me, from within. Conditioning. This isn't what I want, but it is. Fingers moving by their own will, my will or his?

In my vague recollections, I'm aware that when he whispered "Jessica, come here," I behaved like a well-trained puppy all too eager to please him. I was a slave, with no motivations to fight for free will. I didn't have the choice to disobey. That desire was wiped clean from my slate.

Sometimes when I lie in my bed alone in the dark, I recall that first night he forced me to fuck him.

The one thing Kilgrave cannot control is emotion. He can tell you do to anything; jump off a bridge, kill your children, strangle the cat, but he can't ask you to feel anything. It was my one saving grace, when my real self was locked down in the dungeon of my subconscious. He could ask me to love him, and I could go through the motions, but the feeling never existed. I despised him, even when I was forced to push his hair from his eyes and kiss him with passion.

So I was surprised when he didn't rape me the first night. And the second. It wasn't until the third night, after he had changed my wardrobe, hair and makeup, when I had become his doll, that he decided I was ready to be his plaything.

"Jessica," I heard his British tenor almost sing to me from across the apartment that he killed an old, rich couple for. I stepped over their dead bodies on the way to the bedroom. They had only been dead a day but the stench was beginning to permeate the beautiful, ornate foyer they so limply laid in.

"Yes!" I heard my own voice exclaim. It sounded so distant and weak.

"Come here, darling."

I followed his voice obediently. Standing in the middle of the room, he lifted his lanky body from the king bed and walked around me. Inspecting me. He brushed the hair from the back of my neck and kissed me there. Goosebumps rose on my arms. In his mind he believed I was becoming aroused. In reality I was disgusted. Or I wanted to be, but my body was dissenting, a cruel act of betrayal, as I felt my womanhood starting to burn.

His fingers traced my skin from the top of my shoulder down to my hand. I leaned my body into his, letting him take some of my weight. I was wearing a floor length, dark purple nightgown with a high slit. He knelt down beside me and pulled my lace thong down.

"Step out." I did. All the while keep eye contact with him.

He smelled the lace while putting them into the pocket of his suit pants.

He stood behind me once more, his fingers now crept up my thigh and found my wetness.

I felt his breath catch. I knew he was smiling. That smug asshole smile. I hated that fucking smile. Even now, alone in the dark, knowing he's out there somewhere, I want to punch that smile off his face.

One finger moved inside of me. A small moan escaped my lips. One treacherous moan that would give this rapist permission to enter my body. He added another finger.

He pulled away and walked around me to sit on the bed.

"Take your dress off."

I slipped the straps from my shoulders and let it slide down.

"Come to me."

I walked to stand in front of him. He touched my breasts with his cold hands. His lips touched my nipples, my entire body flushed.

He grabbed my right leg and put it onto the bed and flicked my clit with his thumb. I exhaled deeply.

Before I could react, he threw me into the bed, whipped his dick out and inserted it into me. He thrust into me, over and over again, and my brainwashed self enjoyed every minute of it. He came inside of me, then lodged his fingers back inside, and made me lick them. I did so, hungrily.

Then he took his belt, tied my arm to one of the posts, took his tie and wrapped the other hand to the other post so that I was stomach down, with my ass in the air. He picked up a large dildo he had acquired earlier in the day and shoved it into my pussy without warning. He rammed it in and out of me, making me scream in pleasure. I wanted it, the whole thing. As he filled my pussy he ate my asshole, sucked and tongue fucked me till I saw stars. I came so hard I squirted all over the Egyptian cotton linens.

When he asked "Do you want more?" I cried yes.

This time he slammed my tender asshole with that massive dildo until tears streamed down my face. I came again and again until I felt dizzy.

Afterwards, he lit a cigarette and stood out on the balcony. I was told to clean all the dirty sheets. Once I removed them all and replaced them with new ones he came back in and said, "I'm going to like having you around."

I smiled as he touched my face and kissed me.

Now as I lie in the dark, alone, I'm wet and hot. I recall that night, and what he doesn't know is that halfway through that night I was no longer under his control. I wanted him. I wanted it all. I have never been fucked like that nor have I since. Sometimes alone at night, in the dark, I think of that night, and I touch myself.


End file.
